Redemption

Call me shallow but somehow, it's been a month since I last entertained the thought of anything deeper than troubleshooting John D. Edwards in AS400. The last time I must have thought of anything about politics or societal ills, I was half-asleep and wondering about why I can not treat a probationary employee the same way I do a regular employee in terms of certification. Does the labor law cover that? And what can I do if the probationary employee needs to file for a bereavement leave. Oh well...

It has been somewhat painful though. Looking at how the world has been unjust. Earlier I rode a cab - the driver was really nice and quite good. It has been a few days since I last rode with a driver that understood why I need to take a cab from Manila to Ortigas. He mentioned that he had a lot of mistakes as a kid.
I asked why...
"Nabuntis po ng maaga eh..." (I got someone pregnant pretty early)
"Ah, so ilan na po ang anak niyo?" (So how many kids do you now?)
"Anim. Natigil na nga yung panganay eh, nagttrabaho na lang sa Marikina..." (I have 6 kids now. My eldest child just stopped schooling, he's currently working in Marikina)
I stopped for a moment and thought maybe I should stop this talk. I wasn't going to reeled in this whole charade so I can give him a bigger tip. "Ah, buti na lang may trabaho..."(It's good that he is at least working.)
He looked at me funny. "Eh ma'am, hindi man lang nakatapos ng high school." (He never even finished high school.)

That was not so bad, in terms of all the stories I have heard before. Working for a public hospital and being an intern there for almost 700 hours didn't really scathe my belief in humanity, in justice in this world and the ability of the human race to bounce back. It is being human that drives someone to be resilient, to be real and to face the reality no matter how surreal it has become, to own up to one's mistakes and be humble enough to accept that life, in itself is far better than choosing death...

"Hindi na bale, matanda na ako. Mamatay na din ako..." (It doesn't matter, I'm old. I'll die soon.)

I stopped and looked at him. I made sure that I gave him a 50Php tip that wasn't really mandatory. Nonetheless, how can life drain so much of this man, whom I gauged was around 40... How can he stop to believe that death was so much better than living life and fighting every step?